The Christmas Pox
by ilovetvalot
Summary: When Derek Morgan catches a childhood disease at Christmastime, where can he possibly seek sanctuary? Morgan/Garcia, JJ/Will with a featured Henry LaMontagne. TWOSHOT!
1. Chapter 1

_**Author's Note: First, I hope you guys enjoy this new story. It will be updated once a week. **_

_**We have a few announcements for year today. First, don't forget we have a new challenge open on the forum, "Chit Chat on Author's Corner". Sign-ups for our January challenge, "The Happy New Year's Challenge" is open through December 30, 2010. We'd love to have each one of you. Simply swing by the forum (you can link to it thru our profile pages) and sign up with the pairing you'd like to see written and three prompts associated with the holiday. On Jan 1, 2011, you'll be assigned a random pairing (not the one you usually write) and three prompts to write by January 30.**_

_**And don't forget - those that signed up to complete the CM Christmas Fic Gift Exchange, you have exactly FOUR days left. Please PM me if you have any problems.**_

_**Finally, if any of you have any idea for issues/activities that you'd like to see "Chit Chat on Author's Corner" forum tackle in the form of discussion threads and/or challenges, please let us know. We want to bring you all some really fun threads in the New Year!**_

_**As always, thank you to every reader, reviewer, and person that favorites or alerts one of our stories. Hearing from each of you means a great deal to each of us. We truly value your thoughts and opinions. Now, on with our story!**_

* * *

**The Christmas Pox**

**Chapter One**

Trudging up the long sidewalk, Derek Morgan tucked his pillow tightly under his arm as he lifted his other arm to scratch at his neck. Why couldn't he make this itch go away? Why?

Standing on the small porch, he sighed. Now, this was just...humiliating. He'd been forced into a lot of humbling situations in his life, but this just was beyond embarrassing.

He'd been evicted from his own home.

Because, and he really had a lot of trouble believing this next part, a freaking pox was upon him! Glaring down at the small sores on his arm, he shook his head. And it was all compliments of the occupants of the home he stood in front of.

Jamming his finger angrily against the lit doorbell, Derek shifted impatiently on his feet as he tried to fight the urge to rip the Christmas wreath hanging on the door in front of him down and stomp it into mulch. Part of him knew that he needed to get used to these kinds of inconveniences. His life was about to change in a big bad way. There was no doubt about that. And soon, he'd be facing his own little mini-me and all the germs that came with him. But really...this was just unbelievable!

Chicken pox at forty years old! And at Christmastime, no less. Wasn't there some sort of holiday clause that prohibited infectious diseases striking at the most wonderful time of the year?

Grimacing as he scratched at the bumps on his neck again, he heard movement behind the door and the sound of a dead bolt being thrown.

And meeting the startled blue gaze of his former colleague mere moments later, Derek Morgan said simply, "I'm homeless. And it's all your fault."

**/XXX/**

Blinking, Jennifer Jareau stared blankly at her late night visitor as Henry laughed happily from behind her.

"Morgan?" JJ questioned, her eyes squinting as she took in the tall, bald headed man currently leaning against her front door frame. "What are you..."

"The pox," Morgan replied, thrusting his spotted arm underneath her nose, waving the limb emphatically. "Your munchkin gave me the chicken pox and Baby Girl threw me out. The OB said I can't be around her until this is over," he whined, his voice rising a full octave.

"Oh, no," JJ groaned, pulling him inside and closing the front door against the chilly evening air. "Derek, I'm so sorry."

"Unca Derek," two year old Henry Jareau-LaMantagne squealed happily, hurling himself at Morgan's legs and wrapping his arms and legs around his favorite uncle's jeans. "You here!"

"I'm here, Kiddo...for at least forty-eight hours?" he asked JJ hopefully, blinking his eyes pleadingly as he shifted his pillow underneath his arm.

"For as long as you need," JJ corrected with a soft sigh, giving him an awkward hug around her son's body.

"Chere?" Will called from the kitchen, "Who's here?" he asked, walking down the long hallway toward the front door.

"Derek. We contaminated him," JJ groaned over her shoulder, shaking her blonde head as she glanced back at Morgan, wincing as he scratched at a set of spots on his cheek.

"Huh?"

"I 'taminated you?" Henry asked with a confused frown, tugging at his uncle's jeans. "What's that mean?"

Sweeping his nephew into his arms, Derek grinned as he tapped Henry's small nose. "All it means was that bug that made you itch like crazy got me, too. It's like when you caught my cold last month, remember?"

"Only that cold didn't cause your eight months pregnant wife to throw you out of the house," JJ said worriedly, running a hand over her blonde hair as she twisted her lips from side to side. "And at Christmas, too," she moaned, smacking Will in the chest with the back of her hand.

"Ouch!" Will winced, rubbing his chest as he took a step away from the woman that was supposed to love and cherish him. "I didn't give him the pox," he grunted. "Besides, this'll run its course and you'll be home by Christmas Eve," Will said confidently, winking at Henry as the little boy rubbed his uncle's bald head.

"It's okay, Unca Derek. We can just write Santa a note and tell 'im to bring your pwesents here," Henry declared, bring his fingers down and patting Derek's spotted cheeks, his fingers dragging against Morgan's face.

"Ohhhh, kiddo," Derek sighed, the nails like heaven on his face as they scratched the itchy bumps. "Keep doing that for Uncle Derek."

Eyes widening, JJ shook her head, capturing Henry's hands and pulling them away from Morgan's face. "No, you don't, Henry," JJ said firmly. Raising one eyebrow at Morgan, "Unless you want scars all over that manly face of yours?"

"But I iiiitttcccchhh, JJ," Morgan whined, lifting his shoulder to rub his cheek against the rough fabric of his denim shirt.

"Yeah, Mommy," Henry nodded knowingly, his tone sounding identical to his almost uncle's . "The ones on my butt were the WORST," Henry informed his uncle grimly.

"I'm gonna get them on my butt?" Derek yelped one hand going unconsciously to the aforementioned area. "I like my butt the way it is, JJ! So does Mama!"

"Your butt will be fine," JJ said with a long suffering sigh and a pointed look at her young son. Honestly, the moment her little boy had learned to talk had been the end of her life as she knew it.

"It's your balls that you gotta worry about," Will chortled, slapping Derek on the back as the older black man's eyes widened, abject horror shining in his gaze.

"William!" JJ barked, covering her son's ears quickly as she flashed a dangerous look at her partner. "That's enough."

"Whoa! Wait!" Derek said, twisting his head from Will to JJ and then back again, his voice reaching octaves only bats and Sonar could detect. "I wanna know more about what's gonna happen to my balls!"

"Nothing!" JJ huffed, her cheeks flushing as she realized that she was now standing in her foyer talking about her former colleague's reproductive organs in front of her son.

"They're gonna iiiittttchhh," Henry answered innocently, his mother's hands doing nothing to muffle the conversation going on around him.


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author's Note: First, I hope you guys enjoy this new story. It will be updated once a week. **_

_**We have a few announcements for year today. First, don't forget we have a new challenge open on the forum, "Chit Chat on Author's Corner". Sign-ups for our January challenge, "The Happy New Year's Challenge" is open through December 30, 2010. We'd love to have each one of you. Simply swing by the forum (you can link to it thru our profile pages) and sign up with the pairing you'd like to see written and three prompts associated with the holiday. On Jan 1, 2011, you'll be assigned a random pairing (not the one you usually write) and three prompts to write by January 30.**_

_**And don't forget - those that signed up to complete the CM Christmas Fic Gift Exchange, you have exactly THREE days left. Please PM me if you have any problems.**_

_**Finally, if any of you have any idea for issues/activities that you'd like to see "Chit Chat on Author's Corner" forum tackle in the form of discussion threads and/or challenges, please let us know. We want to bring you all some really fun threads in the New Year!**_

_**As always, thank you to every reader, reviewer, and person that favorites or alerts one of our stories. Hearing from each of you means a great deal to each of us. We truly value your thoughts and opinions. Now, on with our story!**_

* * *

**The Christmas Pox**

**Chapter Two**

Closing her eyes, JJ shook her head. This was going to be the longest forty-eight hours of her life. Evidently, God had decided one child simply wasn't enough. He, in His infinite wisdom, had delivered her three….a lovable Cajun, his equally lovable son, and the adoptive one that had just walked through her door. Taking Henry from Morgan's arms, she shifted him easily to Will's waiting arms. "I think it's time for all good little boys to be in bed. Don't forget to say your prayers, Henry," she ordered her son gently.

"I will, Mommy. And I'll tell God to ask Santa to bring Uncle Derek some new balls for Christmas," Henry declared magnanimously as he nodded enthusiastically.

"Oh, Lord," JJ sighed, watching as her laughing boyfriend carried their son up the stairs to bed.

"I'm gonna need new balls, Jayje?" Morgan asked desperately, pulling on JJ's arm as he furrowed his brow. "How serious is this chicken pox thing?"

"You and your balls will be fine, Derek," JJ said, taking the man's pillow from under his arm. "Let's just get you set up in the guest bedroom, okay?"

Following JJ down the hall, Morgan sighed as he passed the lit Christmas tree and the stockings hung on the wooden mantle. Each and every item reminded him more and more of what he was missing with his beloved. He asked seriously, "So, do you really think I'll be home for Christmas?"

Opening the door to the spare bedroom, JJ nodded supportively as she flipped on the light switch. "I do," she said, tossing his pillow on the bed and turning to feel the older man's brow. "If you can follow simple directions."

"What directions?" Derek asked suspiciously, obediently following her pointed finger and sitting on the bed.

"First, no scratching," she said, walking into the guest bathroom and rummaging through the medicine cabinet.

"But I itch," Derek complained, quickly scratching the back of his neck while her back was turned. Maybe, just maybe, he could finally get that spot that had been bothering him for the past five minutes.

"I saw that," she called without turning around.

Rolling his eyes heavenward, he shifted on the bed. He'd forgotten about those maternal superpowers that all mothers seemed to have. Smiling, he wondered how soon his Baby Girl would develop hers. Hell, he thought to himself, she was obviously already well-versed in all manners of ESP, so this motherhood thing would probably be a breeze for her.

"She already has them," JJ said absently.

Jerking his eyes back to the blonde woman as she walked toward him, he wondered if mindreading was a power all mothers were gifted with. "What's that?" he asked as he eyed the bottles JJ carried in her hands.

"This," JJ said holding up a red and white pill bottle, "is for your fever. And this," she said, "is for the achiness," she added, dropping another bottle on the nightstand. "And this," she smiled, holding up a pink bottle of lotion, "is what I use to finger paint your face."

"Uhmmm...pink really isn't my color, JJ," Derek shook his head, recoiling as she twisted the cap off.

"You'll learn to love it and thank me later," JJ muttered, dipping her finger inside and swirling the bottle.

Jerking back as her finger progressed toward his face, Morgan shook his head furiously. Wrinkling his nose as he raised his hands to cover his face, Derek proclaimed, "JJ, that stuff smells like ass! There's no way it's going on my face."

"Do I want to know how exactly you know what ass smells like, Morgan?" JJ asked, cocking her head to the side as she watched the so-called he man shrink away even further.

"It's an expression and you know it," Derek grumbled as JJ's nimble fingers redirected themselves toward his face again, smearing the pink lotion on him. "What is that crap?" he winced.

Still smearing, JJ answered tersely. "Calamine lotion. It'll make the itch bearable."

"You sure about that?" Derek asked, aching to claw his face in spite of the so-called miracle drug.

"Do you want me to go get Henry for confirmation?" JJ asked evenly, moving her ministrations to a cluster of spots on her friend's forehead.

"No," Derek whined, shifting tiredly against the full mattress, "Just hurry."

"Okay," JJ said a few minutes later, satisfied she'd gotten all the visible affected areas treated, "I've taken care of all the skin I wanna see." Dropping the bottle on the nightstand, she added, "I'll leave this here for those places on you that I don't ever wanna look at."

"Gee, thanks, Jayje," Morgan muttered sarcastically, barely resisting the urge to dig at the newest itchiness on his arms. "I can really feel the love here."

"You wanna show me your bare ass?" JJ smirked, arching a brow.

"I do have some pride left," Morgan grumbled, snatching the lotion from the stand and shaking the bottle.

Choking back her laughter as she stared down into his dark face, pink blotches vibrant against his dark skin, JJ murmured, "You have no idea how difficult it is to take that remark seriously right now."

"Out," Derek growled, throwing a finger toward the door as he uncapped the bottle, his nose wrinkling in distaste at the horrid aroma wafting up from the open lid.

Nodding, JJ chuckled. "I'll bring you some bottled water to take your pills. I think we're gonna need all the pharmaceutical assistance we can get to see you through this."

XXX

Forty-eight hours later, JJ wished she'd had used a tranquilizer gun on Derek instead of Motrin and Tylenol.

Tying his scarf like a Christmas bow, she left Morgan standing on his porch steps...a gift Penelope Garcia could unwrap at her leisure. And if the other woman was smart, she might wish to sue the scarf as a gag. God knows, JJ wished she had!

But her life could now return to normal. Fever and spot-free, her job with him was done. So was the whining...the complaining...and the downright orneriness that a sick Derek Morgan brought to a normally cheerful home.

He was Garcia's gift now.

And Santa's elves had nothing on her!

_**Finis**_


End file.
